NEW HOUSE

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BACK:


It'll take some work.

I've been watching this dove that's been camped out in front of my house for a couple of months. It seems to have been since I had the big tree out there cut down. It's been perched on the phone wire nearest to where the tree had been. Looking. Just looking at the spot where the tree had been. I don't know, maybe imagining the good times, the cover, the protection it had provided. And since I've heard that doves stay with their mates, maybe even for life, I wondered if it had lost it's mate. I wondered if it was male or female. It just sat there. Like it never wanted to leave. Like, as if it stayed near the place where it's mate had been, it would still be near him.
It was sort of sad when I thought of it like that. And it made me feel a bit guilty when I first thought of it. But then I got annoyed. It's gone already, find another tree! Or another mate. Maybe another life! ( I really don't think I thought all that about the bird- I'm just taking a little poetic license.)
Then I saw how reticent I was to pack up a cabinet. To empty a drawer. I've been waiting.
Not wanting to leave, just sitting here!
It's time for me to find another tree.
The realization of my own reluctance to move has helped me to see why I've not been able to get more excited about the gift of the new house I have!
My kids came a were so good to pack up 2 rooms now, and my attitude has been, at times, painfully indecisive about the dumbest things. Like where to put books in the new house. I really appreciate Josh and Sarah's patience with me.
And I'm making an effort now to spread those wings and get on board.
My spring theme seems to be to rise up and soar.
By the grace of God.

In My Backyard

The happiest thing I've found to do today is to sit in my backyard. The breeze is hitting the jasmine bush just right, wafting the soothing scent all over me. it's a killer beautiful day! I'm grateful for it. My trees have filled out in their fresh, spring-green leaved splendor. I love my private little park. I love the birds sweetly singing, and calling out to one another from tree to tree. And little white and orange butterflies are dancing over my lawn! I love God for having blessed me with so much.
It's my last birthday here, maybe, as Lucy would put it, "Fo-evor and evor."
But it feels healing, in that, instead of the sadness that I've felt for leaving so much behind, I have a gratitude for what I've had and now have.
It seems I've made a milestone in the grieving of my house and many memories. The ending stage of grief is supposed to be acceptance.
So, for my good old backyard, I accept and am ready to let it be a sanctuary for another soul in need of reprieve.

Happy Easter!

My Easter break flew by, although it felt so slow when it was happening because of the work I had to do, and of the play I had to fore go.
I kept giving myself those adult-talks,like, "you don't have to have a vacation right now. You had a couple of days with the kids, and you should be grateful for time off so that you can get this other stuff done. You do get summer off, you know."
I seemed to really need a lot of those talks. I seemed to be a little whiny and low on self motivation.
I got stuff done. To be honest, I feel a traitor to the name of my blog. Any thanks I gave during it seemed without any soul.
I did have a great time with the kids in Sea World. And it was so adorable seeing my grand babies watch their first movie in the theatre!
The other favorite thing was doing stuff with Sarah. It was great getting Easter stuff ready with her, and going with her, Josh and Lisa to lunch at Cafe Aroma's. A really nice time. It was a memory making little event walking around that little pond I've always wanted to stop at: Lake Fulmore, with Lucy, Jackie, and Sarah. That water is amazingly serene. Like a mirror, mountain blending into mountain, tree into tree. And even shafts of light touching at the water's surface, trying to trick you into thinking that both are real. Or are they?
I remember thinking, but held back, or maybe it came out, OH, THE GLORY!
Even baby Jack clapped his hands when he looked out on that view!
And having the kids with me for the Easter service, well, that's heaven!!
THANKS so much for coming down, Sarah and Josh!!!
That's funny...just blogging about the good stuff cheered me up!
What does it say, "...Whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of GOOD report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy- meditate on these things." Philippians 4:8

Happy Easter!

Time to move

Isaiah chapter 43 says, "Don't consider the former things, leave the past behind, behold I am doing a new thing."
That passage, and the fact that I've been hearing about His opening up new doors for me, gave me the sense that it's time to move.
I got some prayer about moving at church. As they were praying, I pictured a sunset. And the light of the sunset struck me. I felt it was speaking to me of the giving up of the sunrise views that I see from my couch each morning through my French doors. It spoke to me of a new direction. It spoke to me of leaving the memories of this house behind, and looking forward.
And it spoke to me of David's sunset. His night had come, but not really. His light had merely moved out of my view, just as the sun does when it sets. I can't see the powerful "afterglow" that he now lives in, but the glowing remnant of that sunset in my mind made me to know that what he's in now is so much more beautiful!
"He makes all things beautiful in His time."

At any rate, I think it's time to move.
Is. 61:7
"Instead of your shame, you shall have double honor,
And instead of confusion, they shall rejoice in their portion."

Look Up

I'm reminded that I've not been posting much lately. Reflective of my extremely busy and tired state.
But I feel a need to share what has been breathed into my heart. For myself and hopefully for others,too.

So! The verse I "got" for this year is from Psalms 80. It is verse 3, 7, and 19.(anything good bears repeating)

"Restore us, O God;
Cause your face to shine,
And we shall be saved."

It is in meditation that the power of the message comes. This was a verse that just jumped out at me, caught my attention, before I realized why. I just KNEW, as one knows when God has spoken a truth to one's heart.

To me, it was an exciting "us" verse, which spoke to me of myself and my family.
And, I think, corporately to the Body of Christ.
But something I felt God was saying was that His face IS shining on us,but we are only transformed by it when we look up. When we take time to "fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith." It is there that we find our salvation. Not only our eternal salvation, but the saving grace of a changed life.
It's time to change our focus, from the negative circumstances to the beauty, radiant love of our Eternal God.

All this will pass. How will I live in it today depends largely on my focus.
Look Up!

Happy Groundhog Day!!!!

What is today? That famous day: Groundhog day!
I have been so behind in posting, and so uninspired. I think, mostly because of having been sick and then with sick little ones. I very much enjoyed being with them, and felt like I wasn't much help because I just hung out with them and enjoyed them so much. But Sarah insisted otherwise.
But all who have little ones know how hard it is to get around to doing lot of other stuff, like blogging! My hat goes off to you faithful ones.
Anyway, in getting over my own sickness and watching way too much TV, I feel I have nothing inspiring to say.
So, In celebration of the big, afore-mentioned day, I will tell you a story.
It happened at my old school, Panorama Baptist Elementary. The Bible teacher asked the class who remembered what Good Friday was about. One very astute little one raise her hand. (it was a Kinder or 1st grade class) She said, "I know!!" Okay, can you tell the class? She rose, and with the voice of authority, stated, "It was the day that Jesus died on the cross!"
"Very Good!" the teacher replied, but the little one wasn't done.
"Yes and on the 3rd day He rose up again! But," she added, confidently, "If He sees His shadow, He goes back down again."
Supposedly true story....