I saw a sparrow this morning. Flicking his little head this way and that. Perched precariously close to the dog on the back of the lawn chair. And I thought of how perfectly formed he was; how smooth and blended his colors; how his little species all carry that same perfect look.
"His eye is on the sparrow..." the old spiritual goes. And yet....
Some end up on the ground, torn apart by the dog.
His eye is on the sparrow- but today Jaqueline Matchum's funeral, the end of a bitter battle, cancer ravaging her, morphine the only relief from the physical pain.(I had to amend my last statement, as all accounts told of a body in pain, but a woman of faith, who, when she was awake, was calling for more worship, laughing and singing as she awaited her homecoming to her Lord)
His eye is on the sparrow. How much more does He care for me? That's what Jesus said.
What's up with that?
The theories run the gamet, from the old, "It's all God's will," to "God's will is for all to be healed, and sickness is not from Him."
Most of us hold to some sort of middle ground.
Bird species go extinct. The devout environmentalists would not attribute it to God's will. How much does God get blamed for that is our choice, or the devil's?
My mind frantically searched for the truth that He's taught me.
Scripture says, "It is not God's will that any perish, but that all come to the saving knowledge of the truth." But many perish.
Who was Jesus talking to when he said, "My Father in heaven is watching you." Was it only to His own, those who call on His name? Scripture also says, "Be sober, be viligant, for your adversary, the devil, roams about like a lion, SEEKING whom he will devour.” Seeking! His eye is looking towards us also, this scripture addressing those who are God's believers. Still the dilemma. Jesus said that for this reason he came to earth, to destroy the works of the devil. Death, disease, are from the fall, hence, from the devil. Jesus came to give life and life abundantly. He preached a new, different Kingdom than that which we’ve labored under, the Kingdom of God. How did He demonstrate that? By healing the sick and delivering those who were oppressed by the devil.
But still the dilemma. Jaqueline was His own. Her family was serving God, she was a powerful teacher of the youth, a wonderful partner in it with her husband, and an inspiring prophetic voice to our whole church, calling out, calling forth what God was doing, preparing the way for the Lord to come in more power, for revival.
Like John the Baptist. Hmmmmm. John the Baptist, who was killed. Jesus also said, “Unless a seed fall into the ground and dies, it remains alone. But if it dies, it bears much fruit.”
My death, in part has been to figuring this one out. In part, His call to me in getting through my grief, is to trust in His goodness when I can't understand how bad things happen to good people.
“Unless a seed fall to the ground and die, it remains alone.” Jaqueline wasn't alone, but yet God desires to multiply life. Maybe, like John the Baptist, the call to us all is, "He must increase, I must decrease." Our pastor passed out the CD of Jaqueline's 2 sermons to the church in her last 2 years. A friend commented, "Wow, like her voice being heard from the dead!" Because of her death, her words of life will be heard by so many more, and heeded so much more deeply!
What does the Bible say about death? I spent the morning looking and it seems that we weren't promised an escape from the horrors of death.. It just transcends it .
“ Therefore, just as through one man sin entered the world and death through sin, and this death spread to all men, because all have sinned. But the free gift is not like the offense. For if by the one man’s offense many died, much more the the grace of God and the gift by the grace of the one Man, Jesus Christ, abounded to many. " and it also says:....” more those who receive the abundance of grace and of the gift of righteousness will reign in life through the One, Jesus Christ."” Romans 5:12
And in regards to getting out of it: NOT. “It is appointed to man once to die…”
And it says:
"Foolish ones, what you sow is not made alive unless it dies. And what you sow, you don't sow the body that shall be but mere grain. But God gives it a body as He pleases, and to each seed it's own body.... So also is the resurrection of the dead.
The body is sown in corruption, it is raised in incorruption.”
.
Though we contend for healing and life, we lose some battles. But even in the loss, we seem to win. God is able to redeem any situation, to bring life out of death, and to bring hope out of despair.
“So when this corruptible has put on incorruption, and this mortal has put on immortality, then shall be brought to pass the saying that is written: “Death is swallowed up in victory.
O Death, where is your sting?
O Hades, where is your victory?
“But thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.”
It’ as if I’ve been asking,” God, I'm asking if you are watching us all the time, how come such horrible things happen?” And as I read, it's as if He's responding, “Don’t you get it? Come here, step out of time for a minute, and look from My eternal perspective. You are going to be moving out of a temporary struggle and into the eternal joy, peace and Celebration as you have never thought possible. For- ever!”
Selah Paix was born- the day that Jaqueline died. Selah Paid! I screamed for joy when I finally got the call! It felt like it would never come, waiting for hour after hour, and Rosie in labor for 12 or more hours. And the pain. A very strange dichotomy. A waiting for life and a waiting for death.
Did they pass each other on the way?
I'm sitting in the back row of the Church, waiting for the call, yet aching for the Matcham family
And I'm feeling that familiar wave of regret that David couldn't be here. Time to see Selah. When the thought came, yes he can! See Selah, Or did, before she was delivered. When we worship, we are connecting with the very throne-room of God. “Seeing as we have such a great crowd of witnesses surrounding us...." But I’ve always wondered how can he see us, and not be sad?
Because he can see outside of time. Because he knows how temporary this is, and how merciful and loving, just and righteous God is. God, who will put all things right. God, the Great equalizer, the Great Redeemer!
And as for Rosie, in her labor for the newborn perfect "Sparrow", I consider, or Rosie would probably consider " that the sufferings (of labor) of this present time are not worthy to be compared to the glory (beautiful baby girl) that is to be revealed in us.... For we know that the whole creation groans and labors with birth pangs together until now.
Not only that, but be also who have the firstfruits groan within ourselves, eagerly waiting for the adoption, the redemption of our body." Rom. 8:22
But while we're here, "What shall we say to these things: If God be for us, who shall be against us?
He who did not spare His own son, but willingly gave Himself for us all, how shall He not with Him also freely give us all things?
Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall persecution, nakedness, or peril, or sword;
...Yet in all these things we are more than conquerers through Him who loved us.
For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come; Nor height nor depth nor any other created thing, shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord."
Rom 8:31-39
And suddenly it makes sense, "I sing because I'm happy, I sing because I'm free. His eye is on the sparrow, and I know He watches me."
